I wanted to post on here that I have started a new blog it is at the addy below.

www.mylifeafterpancreatitis.blogspot.com

I really hope if you have found this site that you will come to the new one, there is more to my life now.

Lisa Atwell LPN

March 7, 2007

It is with a heavy heart that I write this last blog message. I haven't done the best job with keeping up, but my heart was in the right place when I started this.
My physicial condition has changed so much that I have been doing what needed to be done and with spring coming I don't want to miss another minute of life.
I set out to bring information to others who suffer so desperately with pancreatitis either acute or chronic. I know that I can check this off my list one off with a goal met.
I dedicate this blog to all the men, women and children who have suffered with pancreatitis. To those who came before me and to those who will come long after me. Life doesn't have to be this way, step out and take a chance. I can tell you with utmost certainty that pancreatitis doesn't have anything to offer you but a life of misery. Check that diseased organ at the door in Minnesota and don't look back.
There is a mystery about change, the unseen has a way to beckon us to it, for those with pancreatitis the unseen is a better choice than the life we know.
Please don't let pancreatitis take one more day of your life, it is too precious and it shouldn't be wasted having that type of pain. Each day on earth is a gift, enjoy your present, it is your gift. Blessings to all who held my hand through 10 years of Chronic pancreatitis. You know who you are. A big heart felt "THANK YOU" to those who helped through the ordeal in Minnesota.
To Michael I wouldn't be alive today if not for you. You walked into a bad situation and never looked back. You are truly my knight in shining armour. Now to a life that we have waited for, it began a couple of months ago, I hope you are enjoying it as much as I am.


Lisa Atwell LPN

February 6, 2007

I find myself remembering what pancreatitis was like. All of those long very long years of sickness...... sickness that is now gone. How did this get here..... It is as though I woke up one day and the pain was gone.... THANK GOD the pain is gone..... The pain that I thought was my liver was actually my colon. I have discovered that I have to be very diligent about bowel habits or I get another ileus. I have not had ileus in over a week, I believe I had a chronic ileus there for a few months and I would be symptomatic at least weekly. Since my new discovery I have been able to decrease my oral pain medication intake, and there have been days that I have had to take no oral meds. I think I went 3 days and took 1.5 pills which is wonderful for me. I have always said " if it doesn't hurt then I am not taking anything for it."
This is the life that I dreamed of...... it is finally here. How I long for warm sunny skies to bask in. To be able to dig in the dirt and smell that sweet fragrance of spring. I can't wait.... some how we pick up where we left off at.... to bad I am not going on 31.... I got sick when I was 30..... who would dream that a person would have to wait 10 agonizing years to feel better...... I wasted alot of time on pancreatitis but the information that I needed just wasn't there. Who knows if I had went to MN back then they might not have known what to do for me..... I did have a surgeon at IU Med Center who wanted to do surgery on me... all he could say was how bad I would feel after.... and what a rough surgery it would be.... nothing postitive.... thanks but no thanks.... by the time I had gotten so sick I was ready he had retired and I had to wait... 3 years to find Dr. Sutherland.
Now plans for the future happen. Meetings are going to take place. Meeting people who have help my hand that went through surgery before me, friends that have been made through time and space... the internet.... educational goals are high on my priority list.... returning to work as a nurse someday.... that in it's self would dream of all dreams.... I remember going to sleep on
9-22-06 singing a song in my head....Jesus you are the savior of my soul...... and forever and ever I'll give my praises to you...... Jesus you are the.... you just never know where God will lead.... listen to that still calm voice....
Someday I will get my husband to take my picture to post on here. I am quite skinny now as I have lost an addtional 25 plus pounds since surgery. I have fought the good fight the weight will return in time.

January 24, 2007

Hello fellow followers I wanted to send an update. Here in Indiana winter has finally hit and we had our first real snow on Sunday. Usually it snows by November. Boy, OH, boy am I glad it didn't snow this past Novemeber.
My life has changed so much since my surgery. I no longer wake everyday with sound of my own voice screaming. I do have pain, but it is controllable most of the time, there are rare occasions that I have pain and nothing seems to help but getting off my feet and laying down. All in all it is still a great improvement from what it was. I had my first hemoglobin A1C completed and it was 6.1 the .1 made it high, but the pcp was pleased. I don't understand people that don't want to do this diabetes thing the right way. The complications from diabetes are so preventable, with a little effort and I mean a little effort.
On January 18, 2007 I had to have an ultrasound done for my upper abdominal pain and elevated liver enzymes, as I was checking into radiology I remembered it was a year to the date of having my j-tube inserted. I was over whelmed at how much my life has changed. Don't get me wrong I am not doing cartwheels and there are days that I can barely make myself get up, but eventually I do and push forward. I haven't gained any weight back yet and it seems all the clothes for grown women are in bigger sizes. Funny when I was heavier it seemed they were all in smaller sizes .... guess what we can't win the age old battle women and clothing. I am slowly working on getting my house back in order or should I say in some order. I used to be a rather organized person and tidy at that, amazing how being sick will interfere with every aspect of our lives.
I wanted to ask everyone who has had a tp/ict to make sure they have some type of medical identification especially the diabetes part. I wear a medic alert bracelet but I found some really neat ones on line at a decent cost. These are a little fancier than what I got, but what I purchased was the basic of the basic and I will put the address on here also, I am pleased with what I have, although it would be nice to have a fancier one for special events.

www.custommedicalbracelets.com

Apothecary Products Inc.
11750 12th Avenue South
Burnsville, MN
55337
usually takes 3 weeks for delivery I spent about $13.00 for my bracelet with 2 lines of script
it is silvertone with a very heavy chain, I thought Michael
would never get the extra links to cut off.
Well I will close for now, until my next update.

Jan 17,2007

I am sorry I haven't been able to up date the blog lately. I was doing quite well until last week. I was to have outpatient labs done for hemoglobin A1c to determine long term blood sugars and a c peptide all of this for my insulin pump ( that I am suppose to be getting). I was sitting at the desk of the outpatient registration lady when I felt as though I had gotten kicked in the chest. I had felt these little pains before, but this one lingered. I went to sit down as the lady said " we are done wait for them to call your name". I went to sit down and could hear myself moaning. I thought this sucks having to be NPO prior. I kept thinking once I get something to eat this will to away. In my mind I kept thinking " whimp not the same girl who could go days without eatting". I thought a few times call someone and have them take you home but knowing my husband had a funeral home visit in the evening and that would make him have to get someone to bring him to the hospital to get the vehicle I left I decided I would tough it out and go home. Once home I took off my clothes, ate and went to bed. I had so much to do prior that I had drawn up my insulin and had it in my glucometer and was going to give it after I ate. I put the heating pad up as high as it would go, as long as I didn't move it didn't hurt too bad. I was soo exhausted. The next day it didn't hurt if I didn't move, I knew something was wrong. I called and made a Drs. appointment. I saw my pcp who thought that I had just done too much. I really haven't done anything except maybe laundry and cook, do dishes. I haven't had the stamina to do anything real heavy or hard for that much. He wrote orders for labs and ultrasound. I had the labs done last Thursday and have to wait until tomorrow for the ultrasound. I recieved a call last Friday from the nurse, stating that my liver enzymes were high, specifically I think spgt. I didn't have anything to write on and frankly didn't feel like getting up to write it down. The exhaustion from elevated liver enzymes is awful. I have talked with a few people who have liver problems and one lady said " it sucks, when my enzymes are high, it is about all I can do to get out of bed" I soo believe her. When I first came home from MN and had my first pcp visit he ordered labs and my liver enzymes were elevated then. I wrote Dr. Sutherland and told him and he said they were elevated when I was released about 10 days prior to the first elevation. I know that the elevation had went down they were checked when I had my ileus, soo I don't have an answer. I haven't done much today, no energy. Well I just thought I would post. I wouldn't want my faithful followers to think that I am having fun. Althought I will say I have been sewing a little and am about to finish a nightgown for myself. I have been playing with my not so new embroidery machine that my dh got for me 2 Christmas' ago. I have to sew in the basement as my 2 young cats are into everything and I don't even want to think about them into my needles and sewing stuff. The basement is rather cold this time of year, so I sew when it is warm and the weather is yucky. In the spring and summer I hate being couped up in the dungeon of the basement. Someday I will have a room to sew in, thinking I will take over dd room when she moves out ( someday) I think she is here forever. No matter what the surgery was still worth it, no matter what when ever I do have a good day it is because I had my pancreas removed. With thumpy in I wouldn't be able to eat and would be miserable 24/7 so with that said the surgery was worth it.

December 30,2006
Well faithful followers I am proud to announce to you that it is beginning to seem as though the surgery was " worth it". I know there were a few people who were beginning to wonder what was going on. There were a few who were watching my recovery to decide if they should have surgery. The past couple of weeks I have slowly started having more good than bad days. The bad days are bad but they are not followed by day after day of bad days. I am still recovering and have lost alot of weight (actually 50 lbs)in one year. My strength is increasing, I have even started to sew a little got a nightgown put together ( it only took me 2 months to get it done) who says I am not persistent?
I still have some pain, but it is relieved with medication which did not happen with pancreatitis. Food is good, I can't eat much at one time, but it is still wonderful. I can't believe that for 40 years I had a small bowel obstruction that was only getting worse. At the time of surgery it was a complete obstruction, I would have never been able to eat had that not been fixed. The diabetes is minimal. I use 7U of Lantus a day, and I am getting an insulin pump as soon as the manufacture can figure out what they are doing. I need very small amounts of insulin ( like the pancreas would give) the amount that I take works all day long, I could use about a half of a unit when I eat, but there are no syringes that measure that small of an amount, thus the pump. The pump makes is possible to give a small amount all day and then give extra small amounts. The thing about the diabetes is it is sooo controllable with a little effort. I don't care how much effort you give pancreatitis it is never controllable, never, ever. The tube feeding site is healed and gone expect for the scar.
Michael says he is happy with the surgery and he has no other thing he would like to say. He wanted me to tell everybody that it has been 98 days since I had a cigarette. I had 2 cigarettes the day of surgery, but after that I have not had a cigarette not even a puff. There are days that I would love to have a cigarette, but I know that diabetes and smoking don't mix. I will not loose my feet or legs because of smoking with diabetes. My husband is a surgical nurse and all of the amputations they do are because of diabetes and smoking, it will happen if I con't to smoke and that is not an option. I lost 10 years of my life to pancreatitis I will not loose my mobility again especially for something I can prevent. There were times when I was wheelchair bound. There were times I was soo sick I couldn't hold my head up. There were times I was so sick that I couldn't walk. I would fall flat on my face if I tried to stand up. I can't believe that pancreatitis is a thing of the past, I no longer have pancreatitis..... what more could a girl ask for at Christmas time.... so we begin a new year shortly..... what will 2007 hold..... I don't have an answer...... hope.... hope for a future I didn't think was there...... hope that I will be here in 5 years...... I don't have any answers I am as clueless as everyone else. Will I get back all that I have lost? I don't know. Will I go back to work as a nurse? I don't have an answer. All I know is I haven't done so many things in so long. I want to work in the yard, plant flowers, dig in the dirt. I want to decorate my house. Sew, and sew some more. Watch old movies and actually pay attention to the plot because it doesn't hurt so bad that I can't stand it. Read a book and actually be able to keep up with it. Time will tell all that I will do. Just waking up and not hearing my own voice scream is a good thing for me. Come on 2007 get here I want to put the last 10 years behind me I am ready to move forward....
The picture below was taken 12-28-06 I had went to the Dr.